If I hadn’t heard it at the OBGYN office

Like anything else, pregnancy has its own vernacular and jargon.  My mind is simple.  If I hear a word and don’t know what it means, my brain automatically relates it to either sports, music, or food.

Many of the terms that I initially encountered throughout my wife’s pregnancy were new to me and my mind quickly went to work.

If I hadn’t heard it at the OBGYN office….:

When I heard Braxton-Hicks I thought a new parody-type band had been formed; the Weird Al of country music.

I fully expected sports reporters to be broadcasting/tweeting “The Mets announce their new mid-season manager, Billy Rubin (bilirubin).  Boy, was I surprised when ESPN didn’t seem to know anything about it.

Waiter: Can I interest you in dessert this evening?                                                                Me: Yes, I’d like to try the fontanelle, no whipped cream and decaf coffee, please.  Thank you.

Me: Did you see that Mucous Plug is headlining at Valentines?                                               Friend: Yeah, and Colostrum is opening for them! (what did I just do?)

Lastly, I can imagine a new TU Table Hopping (Sorry Steve) post reading “Check out the region’s newest restaurant, Meconium.  It’s easily identifiable by the ‘greenish’ colored awning.

If you missed it, my mind is simple.  Now, who’s ready to eat?!


About Jason

Always thinking....about something
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One Response to If I hadn’t heard it at the OBGYN office

  1. Jason says:

    Think I should rename this to “If I hadn’t heard it at the OBGYN office. It could be an on-going thing.

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